Bah, Humbug! Merry Christmas!

OK, now is about the time you start wishing the whole thing was over with already.  You know, they should have Christmas in January – that’s when they have all the good sales!  Ho, ho.

Here’s a Christmas blowout:

MP3: “Four Shopping Days Left Until Christmas” Ad jingle

MP3: “Stop Giving Me Crap For Christmas” by Bobby Gaylor

MP3: “Santa’s Too Fat For The Hula Hoop” by Thurl Ravenscroft with the Pixies

MP3: “Ho Ho F***ing Ho” by Kevin Bloody Wilson (Not Safe For Work!)

MP3: “This Time Of Year” by the Mighty Mighty Bosstones

MP3: “Don’t Believe In Christmas” by the Sonics

MP3: “Child Of Winter” by the Beach Boys

MP3: “Season’s Greetings” by Ozzy Osbourne

YouTube: “Winter Wonderland” by Ozzy Osbourne and Jessica Simpson

MP3: “Holiday Message” by Lou Reed

MP3: “Christmas Eve Sarajevo 12-24” by Savatage

MP3: “Christmas All Summer Long” by Deer Tick

MP3: “I Farted On Santa’s Lap” by the Little Stinkers

MP3: “Seasons Greetings” by the Fabulous Thunderbirds

MP3: “Merry Christmas Darling” by the Fabulous Thunderbirds

MP3: “Santa Claus Wants Some Lovin’ ” by Mack Rice

MP3: “Back Door Santa” by the Holmes Brothers

MP3: “Here Comes Santa Claus” by Bob Dylan

MP3: “The Holly and the Ivy” by Annie Lennox

MP3: “I Wish It Was Christmas Today” by Julian Casablancas

MP3: “Lord Of The Dance” by Arthur Brown

MP3: “I Believe In Father Christmas” by Emerson, Lake & Palmer

MP3: “Silver Bells” by Arlo Guthrie & Ed Gerhard

MP3: “Santa Claus Is Comin’ To Town” by the Crystals

MP3: “Silent Night” by Phil Spector & His Artists

YouTube: “Marshmallow World” by Dean Martin & Frank Sinatra

Bonus YouTube: “The Digital Story of the Nativity”

30 Days Out (From Christmas): The Beatles

REPOST: Another popular Christmas post from the past, now with updated links and extra tracks!

From 1963 to 1969 the Beatles gave members of their official fan club a special gift at Christmas: a record unavailable elsewhere.  As the years went by, the messages got more avant-garde, druggy and downright strange.  The 1967 disc was titled “Christmas Time (Is Here Again)” and extracts from a song of that name were scattered among short sketches.  In 1995, Capitol Records issued an uninterrupted edit of the song as the B-side of “Free As A Bird.”  Superimposed near the end are some spoken-word seasonal greetings, taped in 1966, followed by a John Lennon pastiche.  We have also enclosed the Beatles’ Christmas messages from 1968 and 1969 – they were all compiled on an album and given as a final gift to fan club members in 1970.  Today, the album is a rare collector’s item.

MP3: “Christmas Message 1963”

MP3: “Christmas Message 1965”

MP3: “1967 Christmas Time (Is Here Again)”

MP3: “Christmas Message 1968”

MP3: “Christmas Message 1969”

MP3: “Christmas Time (Is Here Again)” (1995 edit)

1967 Christmas record sleeve

Video Du Jour: Scott Weiland

A lot of people are diggin’ Scott Weiland’s new Christmas album, The Most Wonderful Time of Year, while many others are just saying “WTF?” Weiland has put out a video of one song, “Winter Wonderland” where he sports a Hitler Youth haircut (really, that’s what it’s called) and generally acts kind of tranquilized for about two and a half minutes.

For those who thought Bob Dylan’s Christmas album and video two years ago was weird, you’ll dig this …

Checkin’ In For Christmas

Seems almost impossible that it’s already the Christmas season … I could’a sworn July was last week or something. You know time flies when you’re having fun, or not. And so this is Christmas.

This season, we’re gonna do the usual things we do – post blogs with a ton of Christmas music, review the best and worst of 2011 and generally bitch about the state of the world in which we’re livin.’ That’s how we roll, and we certainly appreciate you taking a little time to come and visit while we do that.

As I write this the windows are open and all down my street the neighbors are installing their blinking Christmas lights, their oversized inflatable Santa lawn snow globes and elaborate wrappings around the trees. Most annoying, just across the street somebody has plinky holiday music playing from some contraption in their front yard. Greeeeeaaaaaaaat.

And I went to the grocery store to buy some milk and beer for the weekend, then I stood in line for a while behind people purchasing giant TVs and strange electronic consoles (at the grocery store!). Don’t get me wrong – we certainly participated in Black Friday but we didn’t pepper spray anyone (although my wife made me wish I had some handy). Later on comes the hassle of erecting a tree, and negotiating which visits we must make to family members who wouldn’t care drive out to see us at any time of the year.

But each year we all manage to dig out at least a little bit of the true meaning of Christmas. We all manage to spend a small amount of time with the people we love or care about, and we show a little shred of love by sharing some of ourselves at a truly magical time of year. Or I hope we do – like I hope you do as well. Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays! So let the season begin …

MP3: “Merry Flippin’ Christmas” by Bowling For Soup

MP3: “Rockin’ Around The Christmas Tree” by She & Him

MP3: “It’s The Most Wonderful Time of the Year” by Scott Weiland

MP3: “White Christmas” by Lady Gaga

MP3: “Merry Christmas (I Love You)” by Hawksley Workman

MP3: “Frosty The Snowman” by Steve “Lips” Kudlow, Bumblefoot, Chris Chaney & Kenny Aronoff

MP3: “I’ll Be Home For Christmas” by Bob Dylan

MP3: “Jingle Bell Rock” by Arcade Fire

MP3: “Rockin’ Winter Wonderland” by the Fabulous Thunderbirds

MP3: “Run Rudolph Run” by Keith Richards

30 Days Out (From Christmas): Phil Spector

Day 28 – Before he became a murder defendant and a tabloid joke, Phil Spector was one of the best record producers ever.   In his heyday (1960-65) he produced 25 Top 40 hits, including “You’ve Lost That Lovin’ Feelin'” by the Righteous Brothers – listed by BMI as the 20th century’s most-played song on the radio.  His stable of artists included the Ronettes, Bob B. Soxx and the Blue Jeans, the Crystals, Ike & Tina Turner, the Righteous Brothers and the great Darlene Love.

In 1963 Spector gathered some of these artists to create A Christmas Gift For You, an album of holiday songs with his patented “Wall of Sound” production style.  It is, quite simply, the greatest rock and roll Christmas album of all time.  The Crystals’ atomic-powered “Santa Claus Is Comin’ To Town” (the blueprint for later versions by Bruce Springsteen and many others) and Darlene Love’s amazing “Christmas (Baby, Please Come Home)” are towering classics that only slightly stand above the rest of this great music.

We’re only going to post a few selections from A Christmas Gift For You – if you do not own this masterpiece, do yourself a favor and give it to yourself for Christmas.

MP3: “Santa Claus Is Comin’ To Town” by the Crystals

MP3: “Frosty The Snowman” by the Ronettes

MP3: “Here Comes Santa Claus” by Bob B. Soxx & the Blue Jeans

MP3: “Christmas (Baby, Please Come Home)” by Darlene Love

MP3: “Silent Night” by Phil Spector and His Artists

BONUS: We’ve also included a version of “Rockin’ Around The Christmas Tree” by Ronnie Spector and Darlene Love, from 1992’s A Very Special Christmas 2.

MP3: “Rockin’ Around The Christmas Tree” by Ronnie Spector and Darlene Love

30 Days Out (From Christmas): Soul Christmas

 

Day 27 – In 1968, Atlantic Records was arguably the best R&B record label on the planet.  With all due respect to Berry Gordy’s Motown Records, the Atlantic roster of artists created classic soul and R&B that topped the charts and rocked kids across the world.   So some of the biggest names on Atlantic (and its subsidiaries Atco and Stax) came together in ’68 to put together the simply titled Soul Christmas. 

First out of the gate was a song specificially recorded for the project: “Back Door Santa” by Clarence Carter.  Although that’s an instant keeper, the highlight has to be the two tunes contributed by Otis Redding.  His “White Christmas” is brilliantly bleak, and the arrangement of “Merry Christmas, Baby” set the pattern for many more versions to follow.

The original Soul Christmas is available on CD with some bonus tracks (thanks, Rhino Records!).  It’s the second greatest Christmas album of all time, in our humble opinion.  Our pick for the best?  Tune in tomorrow, same Bat-time, same Bat-URL! 

MP3: “Back Door Santa” by Clarence Carter

MP3: “Merry Christmas, Baby” by Otis Redding

MP3: “Jingle Bells” by Booker T. & the MGs

MP3: “Gee Whiz, It’s Christmas” by Carla Thomas

MP3: “The Christmas Song” by King Curtis

MP3: “White Christmas” by Otis Redding

30 Days Out (From Christmas): Motown 2

 

Day Whatever (I knew we’d screw this up) – Mo’  Motown holiday classics.  The Supremes, the Temptations, Smokey and the Miracles, Stevie Wonder, the Jackson Five.  What more do we need to say?  Except maybe that many of these versions, overlooked at the time as mere holiday tinsel, sound today like stone classics.

Tomorrow, we’ll visit another fine R&B record label for one of the greatest Christmas albums of all time.

MP3: “Little Bright Star” by the Supremes

MP3: “I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus” by the Jackson Five

MP3: “Love Comes With Christmas” by the Temptations

MP3: “I Want To Come Home For Christmas” by Marvin Gaye

MP3: “White Christmas” by Smokey Robinson & the Miracles

MP3: “One Little Christmas Tree” by Stevie Wonder

MP3: “Give Love On Christmas Day” by the Jackson Five (feat. Michael Jackson)

MP3: “The Christmas Song (Merry Christmas To You)” (live at the Apollo) by Marvin Gaye

MP3: “Jingle Bells” by Smokey Robinson & the Miracles

MP3: “Silver Bells” by the Supremes

30 Days Out (From Christmas): Rockin’ Stocking 1970s

 

Day 22– Don’t know about you, but I spent half of the 1970s still in shock from the 1960s.  The one thing you could hold on to was the music – it hadn’t yet gone into the toilet.  Musically, what defined the decade of the 1970s?  Artists who became famous in the previous decade ruled, of course.  Three of the Beatles popped up with holiday songs – one is a classic, one is OK and one is pretty much the worst Christmas single ever, if not one of the worst songs ever committed to vinyl (and CD).  Do I need to point them out for you?  Here’s a clue: two of them are posted here.

In the Seventies there was also black pop, disco and punk.  It was one of those all-inclusive decades.  So why am I so paranoid?  Anyway, today’s post reflects a little of everything, like the 1970s decade its own bad self. 

MP3: “(Gonna Have A) Disco Christmas” by Disco Beat

MP3: “Father Christmas” by the Kinks

MP3: “All I Want For Christmas Is You” by Foghat

MP3: Drive Safely PSA by George Harrison

MP3: “Ding Dong, Ding Dong” by George Harrison

MP3: “Thank God It’s Christmas” by Queen

MP3: “Christmas Must Be Tonight” by the Band

MP3: “It May Be Winter Outside” by the Love Unlimited Orchestra

MP3: “Step Into Christmas” by Elton John

MP3: “The Little Drummer Boy” by the Salsoul Orchestra

MP3: “I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus” by the Mistletoe Disco Band

MP3: “Silent Night” by the Dickies

MP3: Good For Joey’s Nerves radio spot by the Ramones

MP3: “Merry Christmas (I Don’t Wanna Fight Tonight)” by the Ramones

MP3: “Peace On Earth/The Little Drummer Boy” by Bing Crosby & David Bowie

MP3: “Run Rudolph Run” by Keith Richards

MP3: “Santa Claus Is Comin’ To Town” by the Jackson Five

MP3: Peace Message from John and Yoko (1970)

MP3: “Happy Xmas (War Is Over)” (Demo) by John Lennon

30 Days Out (From Christmas): Ha! Ha! Ha! Merry Christmas

 

Day 21 – Most Christmas songs tell a tale of snow, warm wishes, chestnuts roasting on an open fire, and mistletoe.  Then there are others that talk about, well, other things.  Here are some Christmas comedy classics that will not warm your heart, but could cause you to bust a gut.  No grandmas and reindeers here!

MP3: “The Twelve Days of Christmas” by Bob and Doug McKenzie

MP3: “Christmas Time For My Penis” by The Vandals

MP3: “Santafly”by Martin Mull

MP3: “Christmas With The Devil”by Spinal Tap

MP3: “The Twelve Gifts Of Christmas” by Allan Sherman

MP3: “Santa and His Old Lady”by Cheech and Chong

MP3: “Dominick the Italian Christmas Donkey” by Lou Monte

MP3: “Wreck the Halls with Boughs of Holly” by The Three Stooges

MP3: “The Night Santa Went Crazy” by Weird Al Yankovic

MP3: “A St. Nick Dangerous Christmas Eve” by the Firesign Theatre

MP3: “The Chanukkah Song” by Adam Sandler

MP3: “All I Want for Christmas is My Two Front Teeth”  by Spike Jones

MP3: “Christmas Dragnet” by Stan Freberg

MP3: “Merry Christmas” by Clark Griswold (Chevy Chase)

30 Days Out (From Christmas): Louisiana

Day 20 – Our Christmas journey today brings us to the great state of Louisiana – or more precisely, New Orleans.  The Crescent City is home to some of the greatest American musicians of past and modern eras, and being the nice Catholic boys and girls most of ’em are, they really know how to put on a good party at Christmas.  We also veer slightly into Cajun country for a couple of our selections but it’s all Louisiana, it’s all good.  Lassez les bon temps roulet.

MP3: “Christmas In New Orleans” by Louis Armstrong

MP3: “The Day It Snows On Christmas” by Allen Toussaint

MP3: “Christmas Gumbo” by Art Neville

MP3: “Zydeco Christmas” by C. J. Chenier

MP3: “Here Comes Santa Claus” by Joe Bonsall

MP3: “Christmas Fais Do Do” by Marcia Ball

MP3: “Santa Claus Is Comin’ To Town” by Al Hirt

MP3: “I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus” by Pete Fountain

MP3: “Peace Brother Peace” by Dr. John

MP3: “Let It Snow” by the Dixie Cups

MP3: “The Christmas Blues” by the Dukes of Dixieland w/Topsy Chapman & Lars Edegran

MP3: “Santa Don’t Let Me Down” by Earl King

MP3: “All I Want For Christmas (Is A Little Bit Of Music) by Huey Piano Smith & the Clowns

MP3: “Frosty The Snowman” by Fats Domino

MP3: “Such A Night” by Aaron Neville