Deep South: Lone Star Beer

You know how we love our Lone Star Beer around these parts – not really, but it somehow feels like you are not a true Texan if you don’t pop the top on a Lone Star every once in a while.

When I was in college, Lone Star was notoriously one of the “bitter” beers (Texans used to call it “horse piss in a can’) but now it’s not so bad. At least it compares respectably to your other “premium” beers … like, ah, Busch, Keystone and Miller High Life.

OK, so Lone Star is cheap beer. But it has become so ingrained into the Texas mythology that Lone Star is frequently sung about, and bartenders will be happy to slide a cold longneck into your palm any time you want.

If you can, grab a six pack of Lone Star for your next barbecue. Then watch as some lucky person plunges a their hand into the ice and comes up with a cold, dripping Lone Star – and a big Texas smile. Oh brother.

Here are some Texas drinkin’ songs; the ones marked with an asterisk contain “Lone Star Beer” in the lyrics, naturally.

MP3: “Lone Star Beer Commercial” by Two Tons of Steel *

MP3: “What I Like About Texas” by Jerry Jeff Walker *

MP3: “I Gotta Get Drunk” by Willie Nelson

MP3: “West Texas Holiday” by Pat Green *

MP3: “They Ain’t Makin’ Jews Like Jesus Anymore” by Kinky Friedman *

MP3: “Bad Liver and a Broken Heart” by Hayes Carll

MP3: “Bob Wills Music and Lone Star Beer” by Red Steagall *

MP3: “Drinkin’ For Two” by the Hollisters

MP3: “Outlaws and Lone Star Beer” by C.W. McCall *

MP3: “En El Cielo No Hay Cerveza” by Flaco Jiménez

MP3: “Lone Star Beer” by J.W.W. and the Prospectors *

MP3: “Goin Back To Texas” by Ed Burleson *

MP3: “Bar Exam” by the Derailers

MP3: “Up Against The Wall Red Neck” by Jerry Jeff Walker *

It’s Chili Time Again!

Now that the Thanksgiving eatin’ is done, you may want to turn your attention to making some chili – particularly if it’s cold in your part of the country.  Legend has it that the spicy meat concoction was created by the chili queens of 1880s-era San Antonio who came up with the recipe we still use and enhance to this day.   A righteous pot of chili ought to contain some sort of beef, chiles (or chili powder) and tomato sauce if you roll that way.

The big argument is whether or not to add beans to chili.  Now most enlightened thinkers say no, beans take up space that more meat could better occupy.  My in-laws, who live up in New York state, swear up and down that true chili has beans in it but what do they know – they consider grilled weenies real barbecue.  I suppose you can put anything you want in chili – including turkey, pork, duck, even beans – but don’t put any of that stuff in mine.

Years ago I got this book, A Bowl of Red, by Texas writer Frank X. Tolbert and that’s supposed to be the bible of chili heads nationwide.   I kind of think this guy was full of bull (or Lone Star beer) when he wrote this book, because he even sings the praises of chili made at Chasen’s restaurant in Beverly Hills for movie stars, and he talks about how great some brands of canned chili are.  Well, I am partial to Wolf Brand in a can – but with no beans!

Dog Days, Beer Days

I always hate that dead period in American sports – the weeks between the Super Bowl and the beginning of baseball season.  There’s always basketball, but the local team is the Rockets – well, you see my point.

Oh, there are plenty of things to distract us until the first week of April: down here we have the Houston Livestock Show and Rodeo, various Mardi Gras celebrations, South by Southwest over in Austin and this year only, the big ol’ Wrestlemania 25 event in Reliant Stadium.  (By the way, the publicist for rockers AC/DC says they are NOT coming to Wrestlemania after all.  Bummer.)

So while all this stuff is goin’ on, we here in Texas have ample opportunity to enjoy our fine native beers.  Lone Star Beer, a perennial, I’ve written about before.  Today I want to offer some thoughts on my favorite, Shiner Bock.  Shiner is a little town located between Houston and Austin, in a region of Texas inhabited by many descendants of German immigrants.  For about 100 years they’ve brewed some mighty fine beer over in Shiner and this year they are celebrating their centennial with a new brew.

The National Beer Of Texas

 

Lone Star Beer – it’s a Texas thing.  Since the end of Prohibition, Texans have enjoyed this brew which shares the nickname of our state.   As long as I could remember, it tasted frankly like horse piss in a can.  For a long time it was brewed in San Antonio but in 1996 the company was bought out by Stroh Brewing of Detroit.  After that, you rarely saw Lone Star any more.

And it was too bad: Lone Star’s brewery in San Antonio was one of the greatest places in the world to visit.  They had exhibits featuring all kinds of exotic animals, a crazy walk-through wax museum depicting the history of Texas (complete with an Indian scalping some stupid settler) and a real cowboy bar where they gave you little cups of beer.